Every morning, when my alarm goes off, I wake up punching the air. There’s something about being suddenly woken from a dream to reality that takes my annoyance to a new level. Like, babe, I was chilling by a pool, and now I have to clock into work. I mean, who dreams of labor? Okay, delusions aside, I am literally living an answered prayer, so I shake off the irritation and log in. It’s a perpetual cycle of self-loathing mixed with appreciation and gratitude, and I’ve been wondering how to break this endless loop. In this life, it seems you’re either a Corporate Baddie or a Boss Babe entrepreneur. But what if you don’t fit into either of these categories?
As the oldest sister, I felt it was my responsibility to immediately secure the bag. Hell, I started working two jobs in high school—shout out to Target and Regal! Although no one told me I was responsible for breaking generational curses, I have always felt pressure to show my mom that her sacrifices were not in vain and to be a role model for my brother. So, I pushed aside my dreams and forced myself to think more practically.
After graduating from college and law school, I wanted to work for a Fortune 500 company and quickly climb the corporate ladder. However, once I was in this position, I realized that the corporate world is less glamorous than I had imagined. Think more corporate jargon and less Barbie power suits. Like, why do we always circle back after running it up the flagpole? I’m good at my job, but I feel like a zombie most days, sleepwalking through work and doing just enough to satisfy my manager—but realizing I’m not.
Breaking Free from the Corporate Norm
I have shut down any ideas of working for myself for so long. I would tell people that I like the idea of clocking in and clocking out and never worrying about whether I would get paid. Growing up, I watched my mom worry about making ends meet, and that was one thing I wanted to avoid. Ironically, I still found myself there, but that’s a story for another day. I would tell myself entrepreneurship is way too risky, and the thought of not being able to pay my bills would trigger physical manifestations of anxiety. I even took an archetype quiz that labeled me a Corporate Baddie, so I’m where I’m meant to be, right?
WRONG! I’ll let you in on a little secret: I either intentionally or subconsciously chose my answers based on the outcome I wanted. See what lying to yourself gets you? Being a “Corporate Baddie” shouldn’t be a cop-out because you’re scared to live in your purpose. Quite frankly, jobs, corporate setting or not, can be graveyards for your own dreams and passions. Think about it: employees are hired to fulfill someone else’s wants and desires. We spend all day making the CEO’s dreams a reality that by the time we clock out, we’re too tired to chase a dream, let alone dream about one. It’s like we’re burying our aspirations in the service of others and it is imperative that you (and me) don’t let someone else’s dreams stop you from living yours.
Taking the Leap: Audit Your Career and Find Your Passion
Let’s be clear: I’m not attempting to start the next “Great Resignation” because God didn’t say be a fool and the bills still have to be paid. Plus who knows what could happen over the next four years with this current administration? However, I am asking that you take an audit of your life. Reflect on whether you genuinely enjoy your career or are you doing it to check a box or because you believe it’s what you should be doing. Your job should reflect your true passions, not just a societal or familial expectation placed upon you.
Overcoming Regret: Is it Too Late for a Career Change?
I’ll be the first to say that it’s hard to wake up and realize that you’ve put in all this time to accomplish a goal only to discover that it’s not what you want. Hello 4 years of undergrad and 3 years of law school! It’s like where the F is the big ABORT button you see in movies, or at least can I have a redo? I’ll do better, I promise. Alright, maybe it’s too late for me to get a refund on my law degree, but it’s not too late for me, and YOU, to start a new life.
Okay, babe, you’re preaching to the choir, but how do I figure out what’s next for me?
Steps to Discover Your Career Path
1. Stop Caring What Others Think
First, and believe me, it’s easier said than done, stop giving a F about what other people think about you. Do you think Kris Jenner sat around and said oh, maybe I shouldn’t show the world my daughter’s private bits? Absolutely not – the devil works hard, but Kris Jenner works harder. However, to do this, you have to dig deep to determine why the opinions of others matter to you so much. I am not 100% cured of needing external validation, but once I realized that the views of others were holding me back, I stopped caring as much. At the end of the day, people do not think about you as much as you think they do, and if they do, you may want to call the cops because you may have bigger problems on your hands.
2. Take a Career Assessment
Next, try taking a career assessment. I tried Career Explorer’s Assessment. It said it takes 30 minutes to complete, but it felt like way more. I liked that it asked me questions about my personality and what I liked doing, but it could be overwhelming for those who get overstimulated with too many options. My results revealed that I was a visionary, gregarious, fantasy-oriented, positive-emotioned, and candid. Surprisingly, or maybe not so surprising, I got blogger, writer, and journalist – and I swear I was honest taking the test this time. One interesting option was librettist – a new one for me, but I guess it’s a person who writes operas. Hmmm, maybe I should give it a shot…
I also tried ONET, an assessment sponsored by the Department of Labor, which had 60 questions. After completing the test, it breaks down your answers by interest to help identify careers that may be a good fit for you. My test results revealed that I would flourish in a job that involved artistic, social, and enterprising activities. This assessment is cool because it’s simple and breaks down your career results by the amount of experience needed for the job. However, you may not like it if you prefer a dynamic interface with interactive options. I’ll post both links below if you want to try either of them.
3. Start Journaling Your Thoughts
Lastly, it’s time to pull out the journal that has been sitting on your bedside table since the beginning of the year. To be fair, journaling is hard, especially when you don’t know where to start, but don’t worry, I got you, sis! Turn to a blank page or, for some of you, the first page, and use these prompts to help you remember your joy.
- When I was younger, you could always find me…
- My younger self would be surprised that I’m not…
- If money was not an issue, but I had to work, I would…
- If I were to ask everyone around me what I’m good at, they would say…
Use Your Current Job as a Stepping Stone
Okay, done, now what? Quit my job to become an astronaut? No, ma’am, see above, well scratch that, do you, boo! For those not quite ready to quit, think about how you can start cultivating those passions either at your current job or in your personal time. For example, if you wanted to be an actress as a kid but then abandoned your dreams to be an HR manager, volunteer to give a presentation on an emerging issue so that you can practice performing in front of a crowd. Or, if your career assessment predicted that you would excel as a dancer, try finding an adult dance program near you. These are just two examples, but get creative and find other ways you can use your current situation to catapult you to your dream life. In the words of Ronnie from Players Club, “Use what you got to get what you want.”
Remember, sometimes there is only a tiny overlap in what we’re passionate about and the things that will produce income. Don’t force it if you’re not seeing that overlap for yourself. Sometimes, our passions our meant for us and us alone. Carve time out for yourself to find an outlet to tap into. You never know what can happen when you least expect it!
Finally, let’s use this transition period for improvements. I suffer from a bad case of procrastination, which leads me to stress over upcoming deadlines. Now, I’m being very intentional on starting on work projects when they are assigned instead of waiting until the last minute. It may seem like we’re wasting time in our current jobs, but there are always ways to use your current situation to your advantage. It is also essential to make sure that you are not taking those negative attributes to your next opportunity. God can place you in the position to win, but it’s up to you not to mismanage what he has given you.
Just because you’ve been doing it for a while doesn’t mean you have to do it forever. Whether you want to be a Corporate Baddie, a Boss Babe, or something in between – choose YOU. It’s your life, and you can decide how you live it.
Let me know if you tried out the career assessments in the comments and if any career options were surprising! The links can be found by clicking here:
Unsisterly Yours,
Kennedy Marie
Leave a Reply